Tip 4: Don't show your life as it really is
I always play down my life, and present it as miserable. 'Oh it's always raining here (where we live, outside the UK) so I have to dry my enormous pants in front of the fire - and if it gets really cold and damp, then I light the fire.' 'Oh I have to make my own loo paper and don't get me started on fanny pads; luckily my garden is full of nettles so I can weave these into clothing just for us to survive.' I never, ever tell the readers of my blog the full truth about my life. Well, it wouldn't do my reputation as a MISERLY QUEEN any good to show that I might, just, be living normally with plenty of dosh - would it? We actually live in a four-bedroom house that was architect-designed in an acre of landscaped ground with views over a lake (outside the UK, it's important that I tell you that lots) paid for out of a huge inheritance. I describe it as a cold, damp hovel in a tatty, muddy field full of shite and twigs. I describe us having to count every...
